Clemson’s fourth Women’s Roundtable event exceeds expectations

More than 575 young women from six states gathered at the Greenville Convention Center for Clemson University's Division of Community, Engagement, Belonging and Access's fourth annual Women's Roundtable event on Thursday, November 14. The women came from as far away as Ohio and Florida to meet like-minded peers and hear from women who know what it takes to strive for and achieve the extraordinary.

This year's keynote speakers both offered spirited, candid and, at times, hilarious accounts of their life stories that had the standing-room-only crowds on their feet with raucous applause.

Aarti Sequeira, a nationally known chef and judge on numerous Food Network shows known as "The Spice Queen," had to be pushed onto the stage in a wheelchair because a fall the night before left her entire right leg in a splint. Still, she refused to let it stop her from keeping the engagement. That alone had the crowd applauding, and Sequeira's effervescent personality took over from there.

Aarti Sequeira greets the crowd after being helped onstage.

"When the people that organized this conference asked me to speak on women's empowerment, I cringed a little because, for me, that word has become a little overused," said Sequeira, who grew up in Dubai and moved to the U.S. in 1996 when she was 18. "For my generation, a strong, empowered woman often meant sort of an unlikable woman; a little arrogant, a little strong-willed, maybe a little unemotional. That is not who I am. I am very emotional."

Sequeira said that when she won the sixth season of Food Network's reality show, the Next Food Network Star, she was not the picture of an "empowered woman."

"I felt so insecure the whole time, and yet I won," she said, eliciting a round of applause. She said she seized the opportunity to capitalize on her sudden fame and has been growing her brand ever since using three two-word mottos:

• No excuses: "That is the mindset I grew up with. My mom and dad would say to me, 'Dude, you are an Indian woman, so that means you're going to have to work harder.' That mindset got my dad off the farm. It got my mom through typhoid. If you look around this room and talk to anybody, everyone feels like there is something they are fighting against. But each of you has a calling, so don't let those things get you down."

• Box out: "In basketball, there's a move called boxing out, where you take up as much space as possible. But I want you to know that no one can do what you're doing the way you can. There is a specific way that you say and do things. Something about your story and all the pain and joy you've been through makes you the perfect person to be in the exact place you are. So make yourself big, don't make yourself small.

• Focus out: "This is a concept I learned when I did improv comedy in L.A. for a while. Focusing out means if you come up on stage to do a sketch, it can feel like you want to make yourself very small because all these eyes are on you, and you don't want to say something that's not funny. But you have partners in your scene, and if one of them makes a decision, you do everything you can to make it seem like the best decision possible and make them look good. It has been the most powerful lesson I think I've taken into my life, career, mothering, wifehood, friendship, all of it. Focus out."

Aarti Sequeira (right) demonstrates a "box out" move with one of the students from the audience.

Zari Richardson, a recent graduate of the University of South Carolina with a degree in global studies and a minor in Spanish who works as a human resources payroll liaison in the Clemson University College of Arts and Humanities, said she treated herself to the event to meet and connect with professional women and get a sense of community.

"I just started my professional career, and sometimes it can feel a little isolating, especially when there's not a lot of women around you," said Richardson. "So, this was mainly for me, to hear from successful women, and it's worked great. I've met so many amazing women today, gotten phone numbers, and I feel really connected."

The afternoon keynote was delivered by Cynthia M.A. Butler-McIntyre, a masterful orator and renowned educational consultant, advocate and activist who served in the Jefferson Parish School System in Louisiana for 30 years and is the former president of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc.

Cynthia M.A. Butler-McIntyre speaks to the standing-room-only crowd.

She began her speech by recounting how her mother would trick her into believing Santa Claus was on the roof by tapping the underside of a table when it got to be late on Christmas Eve.

"I can't really remember all the ages that this happened, but I probably believed in Santa Claus long after you're supposed to," she laughed. "The point I want to make is: I believed. Until this very day, at this very moment, I attribute that to my life of believing."

Butler-McIntyre said she carried on her mother's lesson in making children believe when she became a kindergarten teacher. She would tell her students they were in the "Smart Kids Class" and that she was the "Smart Kids Class Teacher." She ran into one of her former students the day before the conference who is now a director at one of the airports she traveled through on her way to Greenville. He was with a group of his coworkers.

"Mrs. Butler, tell them what class I was in!" he called out as they approached.

"The smart kids class!" she shouted back.

Butler-McIntyre's speech covered a wide range of subjects but always circled back to the role of women in today's society.

"We are caregivers, mothers, daughters, sisters, aunts and grandmothers, entrepreneurs, advocates and activists. We are pillars in our families, and in our communities, and in most of our roles, we have seen great success," she said, noting that the psychologist William James, who is known for his formula on self-esteem and confidence, said that confidence is a predictor of success.

Cynthia M.A. Butler-McIntyre

And then she surprised everyone by quoting Cardi B:

"She says, 'Confidence is contagious. Try to catch it,'" said Butler-McIntyre. "That stopped me in my tracks when I heard that. Confidence is contagious. Let's all try to catch it."

Layla Warren, a senior studying health science at Newberry College, said she would leave the event feeling inspired.

"I really like that everybody in the panel discussions had a different story. They had a psychologist, therapists, and a woman who works for NASA. Everybody wasn't the same, and I got a lot out of that," Warren said. "I took a lot from their stories about not giving up. We know that being a doctor isn't easy, and getting a job at NASA isn't easy either. But having them tell us not to give up on going after what we want was awesome."

Peggy Winder (left) and Layla Warren

Peggy Winder, a physical education teacher at Newberry College, attended the event with a group of 17 students, including Warren.

"That's what I'm hoping they take away from this day. Everybody is going to be different and get to different places at different times," said Winder. "I want them to understand that's ok and that we must keep moving forward, like the Little Engine that Could. We have to keep on chugging."

Warren said she came to the convention center with measured expectations but was blown away that morning.

"I would definitely recommend this to other students. I'm not going to lie; I came here thinking we would just hear a bunch of people talk, but it's definitely more than that. I actually really, really enjoyed myself."

Sequeira said being a young woman today is more challenging than ever because, with social media, they are always on display.

"Every moment could be content, so it can be really difficult to show imperfections," she said. "Look at filters - we can't even show our face as it really is! [But] your calling is to do it in all your brokenness, all your weakness, all your imperfection, all your strength, all your kindness, the way that you are."

Sequeira then wrapped up her point with a fortuitous call forward to Butler-McIntyre's speech later that day.

"As long as you believe, you are aligned with your calling and are meant to be there."

Public link

Please use the above public link if you want to share this noodl on another website.