USAG Japan hosts ‘Love Project’ event to build family strength, boost community resilience

CAMP ZAMA, Japan - U.S. Army Garrison Japan recently hosted an event to boost communication skills for community couples to increase family strength and resilience.

The "Yakiniku and Conversation" dinner, co-hosted by the Army Community Service's Family Advocacy Program and the Religious Support Office on Nov. 15, was the latest in a new series of "Love Project" events.

Family Advocacy Program specialist Jennifer Luera and Chaplain (Lt. Col.) Damon Saxton said they decided to work together to jointly host the Love Project to benefit community residents. They said the bimonthly events switch focus from the full family, including children, to events tailored only for the couples, such as the yakiniku night.

Saxton and Luera, joined by other team staffers, worked to make the event special, offering candlelit tables on the outdoor courtyard at the Camp Zama chapel.

Only one couple sat at each table to allow for one-on-one conversation, and each couple was provided an electric grill to cook their dinner of yakiniku, or grilled meat, together.

During opening remarks, Saxton explained that the educational aspect of the event would be based on the Gottman Institute's "Gottman Method" of couples' therapy.

The couples were invited to digitally download a set of helpful questions, statements and ideas for discussion, and were asked to put that relationship wellness tool to work while enjoying each other's company.

"It's important to get to know your partners - what they like and don't like, what scares them or what embarrasses them, what their goals are and what their dreams are," Saxton said. "That's what building a 'love map' of your partner is and we're going to do that tonight."

Luera said the purpose of the training was to increase healthy communication, thereby decreasing relationship risk factors across the community.

"We really understand that effective communication is the foundation and the cornerstone of a healthy relationship and that's what we want to bring to couples that attend this event," Luera said.

Nicole Venable, a Family Advocacy Program specialist, said her team was brainstorming ideas for the night, looking for a way to tie it to Japanese culture. One teammate mentioned the grills stocked in the ACS lending locker, Venable said, and "yakiniku was the obvious idea."

Venable said participant feedback on the Love Project events has been overwhelmingly positive.

"They really love the events," she said, "and they're having fun but also learning as couples and families."

Matt and Tara Rojas, both Department of the Army civilian employees at Camp Zama, said they decided to attend the yakiniku night because they heard how successful previous events were.

"It's important for the garrison to offer these sorts of events because they help build resiliency in the community." Matt said. "Couples and families can break away from the daily grind and spend meaningful time to build or strengthen those relationships using new tools or insights. Something as simple as not having to plan or worry about dinner for one night can be just the thing we need."

Tara agreed, saying that Love Project events can help spouses with communication and awareness to keep relationships on track.

"I would definitely recommend these types of events … usually what is being addressed is beneficial to all relationships," she said. "Sometimes it is not on our radar to communicate well with our spouse or significant other."

Matt said he was glad he attended the recent event.

"My biggest personal takeaway from the event was confirmation that after nearly 23 years of marriage, we know an awful lot about each other, but there is still more to learn," he said.

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